概要写作 · 真题精练

6 篇上海卷风格真题 · 要点分析 + 参考范文

📖 概要写作 · 真题精练(6 篇)

本页精选 6 篇上海卷风格概要写作真题(教学原创改编)。每篇包含:原文 → 要点分析 → 参考范文 → 高分点评。

建议做法:先自己写(20 分钟),再对照"要点分析"和"参考范文",看看"要点是否齐全""语言是否流畅""词数是否合适"。

🎯 使用建议:每天 1 篇,6 天完成。写完对照范文,重点看"自己漏了什么要点""哪些句子可以改写得更简洁"。

1真题 1 · 环保主题

原文(约 300 词)
Reducing Plastic Waste Para 1: Every year, millions of tons of plastic waste end up in our oceans. This is a serious problem because plastic does not break down easily. It can stay in the environment for hundreds of years, harming fish and other sea animals.

Para 2: One of the main causes of plastic pollution is single-use plastic items, such as plastic bags, bottles, and straws. People use them for only a few minutes, but they last for centuries in the environment.

Para 3: To solve this problem, we need to take action. First, we should reduce our use of single-use plastic. For example, we can bring our own shopping bags and water bottles. Second, we should recycle plastic products whenever possible. Third, governments should pass laws to limit the production and use of plastic.

Para 4: In conclusion, plastic pollution is a global problem that requires global action. If we all do our part, we can protect our planet for future generations.
分析(先自己做,再看)
要点 + 参考范文
要点分析
  1. 问题:塑料污染严重(每年数百万吨塑料进入海洋,塑料难以分解);
  2. 原因:一次性塑料制品使用量大(用几分钟,存留几百年);
  3. 解决方案:减少使用、回收利用、政府立法;
  4. 结论:塑料污染需要全球共同行动。
参考范文 The passage discusses the serious problem of plastic pollution. Millions of tons of plastic waste enter the oceans each year, harming sea animals, mainly due to single-use plastic items. To address this, we should reduce our use of such products, recycle plastic whenever possible, and urge governments to pass relevant laws. In short, plastic pollution requires global action. 约 62 词
高分点评
  • 开头用 The passage discusses... 点明主旨;
  • 用 mainly due to 引出原因,用 To address this 引出对策——逻辑清晰;
  • 用 In short 总结全文;
  • 句式亮点:分词短语 harming sea animals 作结果状语。

2真题 2 · 科技主题

原文(约 300 词)
Artificial Intelligence in Our Daily Lives Para 1: Artificial intelligence, or AI, is changing the way we live and work. It is no longer just a topic in science fiction—it is now part of our everyday lives.

Para 2: AI has many practical applications. In healthcare, AI can help doctors diagnose diseases more accurately. In education, AI can provide personalized learning experiences for students. In transportation, self-driving cars are being developed to reduce traffic accidents.

Para 3: However, AI also brings challenges. Some people worry that AI will replace human workers, leading to unemployment. Others are concerned about privacy, as AI systems collect large amounts of personal data.

Para 4: In conclusion, AI offers both opportunities and challenges. To benefit from AI while minimizing its risks, we need to develop it responsibly and make sure it serves humanity.
分析(先自己做,再看)
要点 + 参考范文
要点分析
  1. 现象:人工智能正在改变我们的生活;
  2. 应用:医疗(诊断疾病)、教育(个性化学习)、交通(自动驾驶);
  3. 挑战:可能取代人类工作、引发隐私问题;
  4. 结论:AI 既是机遇也是挑战,需要负责任地发展。
参考范文 The passage discusses how artificial intelligence is changing our daily lives. AI has many practical applications, such as diagnosing diseases, providing personalized learning, and developing self-driving cars. However, it also raises concerns about job losses and privacy. In conclusion, AI offers both opportunities and challenges, so we must develop it responsibly. 约 60 词
高分点评
  • 用 such as 引出具体应用,例子精炼;
  • 用 However 转折,用 In conclusion 总结;
  • 用 so we must... 引出结论,逻辑紧密;
  • 句式亮点:现在进行时 is changing 表示"正在发生"。

3真题 3 · 教育主题

原文(约 300 词)
Reading for Pleasure Para 1: In today's digital age, many young people spend hours on their phones instead of reading books. However, reading for pleasure has many benefits that cannot be replaced by screens.

Para 2: First, reading improves language skills. When we read, we learn new words, sentence structures, and writing styles. This helps us become better writers and communicators. Second, reading expands our knowledge. Through books, we can learn about history, science, and different cultures without leaving our homes. Third, reading develops empathy. When we read stories, we step into the lives of others and understand their feelings.

Para 3: Unfortunately, reading for pleasure is declining among young people. Schools and parents should encourage students to read more. For example, they can set aside time for daily reading and provide access to a wide range of books.

Para 4: In short, reading is not only a way to learn, but also a way to grow as a person.
分析(先自己做,再看)
要点 + 参考范文
要点分析
  1. 现象:年轻人阅读兴趣下降,但阅读有许多好处;
  2. 好处 1:提高语言能力(词汇、句式、写作);
  3. 好处 2:扩展知识(历史、科学、文化);
  4. 好处 3:培养共情(理解他人感受);
  5. 建议:学校和家长应鼓励阅读。
参考范文 The passage discusses the benefits of reading for pleasure. Although young people today read less, reading still plays an essential role. It improves language skills, expands knowledge about the world, and develops empathy for others. Schools and parents should therefore encourage students to read more. In short, reading helps us both learn and grow. 约 60 词
高分点评
  • 用 Although 引导让步状语从句,突出"对比";
  • 用 therefore 引出建议,逻辑连贯;
  • 用 3 个并列动词 improves / expands / develops 概括 3 个好处,非常精炼;
  • 结尾用 both...and... 强调"学习与成长"。

4真题 4 · 健康主题

原文(约 300 词)
The Importance of Sleep Para 1: Sleep is one of the most basic human needs, yet many people do not get enough of it. Studies show that over 30% of adults sleep less than six hours a night.

Para 2: Lack of sleep has serious consequences. First, it affects our physical health. People who don't sleep enough are more likely to get sick. Second, it affects our mental health. Sleep problems are closely linked to anxiety and depression. Third, it affects our performance at work or school. Tired people cannot focus or think clearly.

Para 3: To improve sleep, we should develop good habits. Going to bed and getting up at the same time every day helps. Avoiding coffee and electronic devices before bed also helps. Finally, regular exercise can improve the quality of sleep.

Para 4: In short, sleep is not a luxury, but a necessity. We should take it seriously.
分析(先自己做,再看)
要点 + 参考范文
要点分析
  1. 现象:许多人睡眠不足(30% 成年人每晚睡不到 6 小时);
  2. 危害:影响身体健康、心理健康、工作/学习表现;
  3. 建议:固定作息、睡前避免咖啡和电子产品、经常锻炼;
  4. 结论:睡眠是必需品,不是奢侈品。
参考范文 The passage emphasizes the importance of sleep, pointing out that many people do not get enough of it. Lack of sleep damages physical and mental health, and harms work or study performance. To sleep better, we should keep regular hours, avoid coffee and screens before bed, and exercise regularly. In short, sleep is a necessity, not a luxury. 约 62 词
高分点评
  • 用分词短语 pointing out that... 补充说明,句式高级;
  • 用 3 个并列动词 keep / avoid / exercise 概括 3 个建议,精炼;
  • 结尾用 not a luxury, but a necessity 呼应原文,语气强烈。

5真题 5 · 社会主题

原文(约 300 词)
Volunteering: A Win-Win Activity Para 1: Volunteering is becoming increasingly popular among young people around the world. It means giving your time and effort to help others without expecting any payment.

Para 2: Volunteering benefits the community. For example, volunteers can help clean up parks, tutor children, or visit the elderly. Their work makes society a better place for everyone.

Para 3: But volunteering also benefits the volunteers themselves. Through volunteering, young people can develop new skills, gain work experience, and build friendships. They can also learn more about social issues and become more responsible citizens.

Para 4: In short, volunteering is a win-win activity. Whether you want to help others or to grow yourself, volunteering is a great choice.
分析(先自己做,再看)
要点 + 参考范文
要点分析
  1. 现象:志愿服务在年轻人中越来越流行;
  2. 益处 1:有利于社区(帮助他人、改善社会);
  3. 益处 2:有利于志愿者本人(技能、经验、友谊、责任感);
  4. 结论:志愿服务是"双赢"活动。
参考范文 The passage discusses the growing popularity of volunteering among young people. Volunteering benefits the community by improving the environment and helping those in need. More importantly, it also benefits volunteers themselves, helping them develop skills, gain experience, and build friendships. In short, volunteering is a win-win activity. 约 60 词
高分点评
  • 用 by improving... 和 helping... 并列分词短语,句子流畅;
  • 用 More importantly 引出"更重要的益处",突出重点;
  • 结尾用 In short 归纳全文。

6真题 6 · 旅行主题

原文(约 300 词)
Why Travel Matters Para 1: In recent years, travelling has become more accessible than ever. Cheap flights and online booking make it possible for ordinary people to visit distant places.

Para 2: Travelling offers many benefits. First, it broadens our horizons. When we travel, we meet people from different backgrounds and learn about their customs and traditions. Second, it helps us grow as individuals. Facing unfamiliar situations, we become more independent and confident. Third, travelling reduces stress. Escaping from daily routine and enjoying beautiful scenery can refresh our minds.

Para 3: However, travelling also has a downside. It can be expensive, and it contributes to environmental problems such as carbon emissions.

Para 4: In short, travelling is a meaningful experience, but we should travel responsibly.
分析(先自己做,再看)
要点 + 参考范文
要点分析
  1. 现象:旅行变得越来越方便;
  2. 益处 1:开阔视野(认识不同背景的人、了解习俗);
  3. 益处 2:帮助个人成长(独立、自信);
  4. 益处 3:减轻压力(逃离日常、享受风景);
  5. 问题:旅行费用高、带来环境问题;
  6. 结论:旅行有意义,但要"负责任地旅行"。
参考范文 The passage discusses why travelling matters. Travelling broadens our horizons by exposing us to different cultures, helps us grow more independent and confident, and reduces stress. However, it can be costly and harmful to the environment. Therefore, we should travel responsibly so as to enjoy its benefits while reducing its downsides. 约 62 词
高分点评
  • 用 by exposing us to... 引出方式,句式紧凑;
  • 用 3 个并列动词 broadens / helps / reduces 概括 3 个好处;
  • 用 However 引出问题,用 Therefore 引出结论;
  • 用 so as to... 引出目的,句式高级。

✓6 篇真题的"共性规律"

共性规律
结构规律

6 篇原文都是同一个结构:现象 / 问题 → 原因 / 好处 → 建议 / 挑战 → 结论。概要写作时,抓住这 4 部分,就是 4 个要点。

词数规律

6 篇参考范文都在 60—62 词。这是最"稳妥"的词数——既不超 80,又不低于 40,要点又能全部涵盖。

句式规律

6 篇范文都用了:① 开头点主旨句;② 3 个并列动词/短语概括要点;③ However / Therefore / In short 等连接词。

高频句式

· 开头:The passage discusses / mainly talks about...
· 并列:broadens..., helps..., and reduces...
· 转折:However, ...
· 结论:In short / In conclusion / Therefore, ...

本页复习清单
  1. 6 篇真题覆盖环保 / 科技 / 教育 / 健康 / 社会 / 旅行六大主题,都是上海卷的高频话题。
  2. 每篇的"结构"都是:现象 → 原因 / 好处 → 建议 / 挑战 → 结论。
  3. 参考范文词数控制在 60—62 词,最稳妥。
  4. 参考范文用了大量"并列动词"概括要点——简洁、清晰、得分稳。
  5. 重点积累:The passage discusses... / mainly due to / In short / However / Therefore 等开头、结尾、逻辑词。